Why I find it very hard to date

3 years ago I was engaged to be married and had just had a baby, yeah life was grand. My fiance turned into a raging coke-head, so me and the little one split. A year later I finally got up the nerve (and energy) to start dating again. Bad idea. I dated someone for a year and realized I really kind of hated him and kicked his ass out too. Then another year goes by...I vowed to never date again. At that point I was happy just being with my little girl and turning into a 27 year old cat lady. In August I moved into a new house and *suprise* I have a hott neighbor. We hung out a few times very casually and he was clear about my past and everything I had been through, and where I was on the dating thing…or at least I thought. I eventually asked him to go to the bar with me and a few friends from work, and we had a decent time. He was pouring it on thick by the end of the night, but I was ready to just go home and pass out. We drove together and this is what happened after the bar:

He pulls into our subdivision and continues to pass our street.
Me: “Hey! Where are you going? You just passed our street.”
Him: “Shhh. It’s ok.”
Me: “Um, no….it’s not. I really have to pee and you just passed two houses that I know have bathrooms.”
Him: Laughing, “Shhh.” Grabs and pats my arm while trying to hold my hand. “What, you don’t trust me? I want to stop somewhere. We’re almost there.”
Me: “Um…” Getting freaked out.

He pulls in front of a house in the back of our sub and jumps out telling me he’ll be right back. WTF? Ok, I have an idea what he's got in mind and I'm so not excited about it. Granted, it’s 3am and I HAVE TO PEE!! I’m sitting there for about 10 minutes, staring longingly at the shrubs next to the house and someone comes out to take out the trash. I take this opportunity to literally JUMP out of the truck and ask if I can come in and use their bathroom. He stars at me blankly and then gestures me inside and points to the bathroom (not speaking because he doesn’t speak English).

As I go towards the bathroom my neighbor comes out with another guy. Great, just a little too farmiliar for me. I pee. I come out and am immediately offerred a beer. No, gracias, I say. I'm handed a beer. Neighbor guy is getting touchy and I’m moving away as carefully as I can on the couch. I’m surrounded by 5 Mexicans who don’t speak English but keep yammering on in Spanish about my ass. Little did they know I know Spanish. One of the guys is on the phone getting overly excited about “picking it up” a few blocks away. I sip my beer and try to look dumb. Then the guy looks at my neighbor and says, “Ok, but you have to go pick it up *here*”. Neighbor looks at me, rubs my back, grabs my hand and says, “That’s cool right, Baby?”
Me: Shaking my head. "You're kidding right?"
Him: "It's not far. It'll only take a few minutes."
Me: “No, not cool! Take me home. I want to go home NOW. AHORA!!!! Take me the fuck home, YOU ASSHOLE. I am not going on a drug run with you! TAKE ME HOME!!!!!!”
Him: *cringing*

He still calls me periodically to see if I'm still mad at him, I've not answered once. The only thing that sucks is that he lives directly accross the street so it's a bit akward when we're both outside at the same time. I just want my cd back.

I honestly wonder about some people.

The girl whose boyfriend treats them like shit yet she's constantly crying over him.

They girl whose only focus is getting married, and it really doesn't matter at this point to whom.

The girl who keeps making her hair bigger and bigger every day to "hide her secrets".

The ex who "has things to do" so he can't keep his daughter for 2 more hours.

The grandmother who won't be babysitting on Friday because, as of today (Wednesday), it's supposed to snow on Friday.

The girl who doesn't understand the term "personal space".

The girl who has two kids and acts like she has twenty.

The mother of three that sends out the perfect family Christmas card.

The cat that pees on the bathmat even though he has fresh litter in his box.

The Princess who dumps entire boxes of cereal over her head and rolls around in it on the living room carpet while mommy gets ready for work.

The brother who continuously tells his girlfriend, "I was going to ask you to marry me this one day, but..."

Anyone who leaves cryptic voicemail messages.

The guy who tries way too fucking hard to get you to like him even though you already do.

Let the naughtiness begin!

First off, this blog is not about that kind of naughty so move along if that's what you'd hoped for.

Let's see here...some background...

I'm a single mother of a georgeous and very energized 3 1/2 year old little girl. Her father and I ended our 7 year relationship when she was one, and although we remain friendly (what choice do we really have?) , I'm trying desparately to start over and cut him out emotionally. So far, I've only had a few relapses where I think I might want to try again, but I usually come to my senses as soon as I speak to him. Don't get me wrong, he's a great guy, just a horrible fiance. I'm sure I'll delve more into the our destructive realtionship in the future.

I have the best job in the world managing a hair salon, and I love every minute of it.

I recently bought a new house and car and I'm finally getting on my feet financially. Go me.

I don't go out much anymore but I adore drinking like you would a second child. I used to blog about 4 years ago but gave up due to lack of funds for the internet - yes, i was that poor. Hopefully I'll get back into the swing of things soon.

For now, call me Naughty, my daughter Princess and my ex Dusty. I will explain it all later.